Sunday, December 03, 2006

Chided for being single

After feeding the cats in the park, I was enjoying the moment of giving White Neck a head massage as he was lying near my feet and Fat Cat was relaxing not far away under the pavillion. The rain had reduced to a slight drizzle.

Suddenly, this lady walked into the pavillion and smile at me. I have seen her around my block as she is staying with her daughter and son-in-law and helping to take care of her grandson. Once while mum and I were feeding the cats at the pavillion, she also brought her grandson in the stroller and sat there, watching us.

Mum said for the past few weeks, she would come with her grandson and talked to mum while she fed the cats.

This morning, she asked where my mum was. I had trouble understanding her in her heavily accented Chinese but I recognised some words and told her mum was somewhere practising her taichi. Then she said something about the cats and remarked how fat Fat Cat is. She asked me whether I am working, how old I am and whether I'm married. Her reaction was quite hilarious when I told her I'm 28 and single. She scolded me that I am silly and I should get married soon and have at least a kid. The cats won't be with me for life. I smilingly told her Mum shares her concerns too and this lady said my mum is right and I should do something about it. haha. I told her I leave it to fate. I found it funny that she looks so frustrated that I'm single. She also shared that she was married at 27 and has a son and daughter whom she can rely on to take care of her in her old age.

I had to leave to feed Noisy at the void deck and told her she will find Mum at the pavillion as usual on weekdays. I bid her goodbye and left her resting on the stone chair with White Neck and Fat Cat resting on the floor.

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

My mum has been nagging at me on the same issue as the lady, though not on the topic of having kids for old age.

I think no matter how much we hope our kids will take care of us when we are old, it should never be something that we expect. No matter how we treat our parents, and how we bring up our (future) kids, we have no control over other people. Imagine how you would feel if you are taking care of your parents because of emotional blackmail. There would be no heart in it. In this case, would you really want it of your kids? To know they are taking care of you because they have to, and not because they want to?

I would rather be with a good man I love, have my kids (and cats!) and let my kids be with us if they want. I'd rely on myself and my man to take care of us in our old age...

coboypb said...

Mum has been nagging me too. I agree with you that it's about finding the man I love and a man who loves me and the kids are part of the happy marriage and family.

Dawn said...

I think some people cannot imagine the alternative - ie they're so used to the IDEA of marriage and kids that they never consider whether it's something they REALLY want.